Speaking to women who have lost children - babies, infants, adolescents - I often hear how after an amount of time had passed since the death, they felt that certain friends and family members thought they should be moving on by now. For the mothers and fathers however, it felt as if their child had only just died - their devastating pain was as raw as ever and they needed every single ounce of help, just to get up in the mornings. I remember one man, someone very dear to me, who had just lost a baby boy at birth, saying that, had he and his wife not had their first-born that still needed looking after, they would never had got up, ever again.
Of course, true friends will be 'there' for us, however 'boring', annoying, sad, depressed or negative we may be. Sometimes, however, we ourselves - however wonderfully supportive our near and dear are - don't want to 'put upon' our friends and family, for whatever reason. That is where a counsellor could be very useful. Talking to someone who is not a friend and not related, has proven helpful for so many million of people around the globe.
A counsellor is there to facilitate a safe space for you, the client. The counsellor is not a doctor, they aren't there to 'fix' anything; they are there to listen to you - the expert on yourself - with true empathy and without passing judgment, helping you to make sense of all the often conflicting thoughts in your head. The counsellor has no agenda and the therapeutic hour - often 50 minutes - is yours to use as you see fit, in order to get what you need from your counselling session.
At Muma Nurture, we are keeping up to date with the latest advice in this ever-changing situation and, although we can't (wo-)man our office, we are still offering our services online.
If you would like to explore your feelings around losing your baby, please contact Muma Nurture and we’ll arrange for you to talk to one of our qualified counsellors - by phone or video chat.
We are here to help!