April Fool's Day and baby loss
The first of April is a light-hearted tradition of pranking friends and family. Since the appearance of social media, the pranking seems to have got slightly out of hand and now often extends to strangers. There's one joke that always appears every year and just isn't funny to many grieving women and men: pretending to be pregnant. Although a fake pregnancy announcement might seem like the ultimate April Fools' Day prank to some, it can be particularly heartbreaking for those who are struggling to conceive, have experienced a miscarriage or lost a child.
People do argue that everything can be joked about and that there will always be someone who takes offence at something. I am not arguing with that per se; I am well aware that we all find different things funny. I am just wanting to remind people to think about other peoples' feelings; be kind to each other. What happened to the family friendly pranks of our childhood, like hand soap that in fact makes your hands dirty...hard-boiled eggs in the egg tray...fake dog poo on the floor...? Harmless, often silly, jokes.
According to studies, one in four women will experience a miscarriage in her lifetime and around 3000 stillbirths occur every year, in the UK. Despite this, many women don't talk about their experiences. If we were to talk more openly about our experiences, I truly believe we would not only help ourselves, but also create a sort of community conveying the message that We are not alone. Countless studies show how we need to feel part of a community, something bigger, to keep mentally well.
Grief following the unexpected death of your child is an enormously intense and enduring experience, which can turn into long-term depression and you may struggle to get out of bed in the morning; you find lots of things triggering and like you're constantly close to tears. Loss can also be the catalyst for any unresolved problems coming back to the fore and bringing about a wide range of emotions, including guilt and anger.
Your child dying is something you never ‘get over’; it stays with you forever. But, with the right help, you could learn to cope with everyday life and maybe even to think about your baby without the overwhelming and paralysing devastation that was there when she first died; it is very important that you get the support that is right for you.
At Muma Nurture, we provide hypnotherapy (which works on the subconscious to change negative thinking, encouraging more positive thoughts and self-support), reflexology (a nurturing treatment that can help bring your body systems back into a state of balance) and
Counselling, a one-to-one, talking therapy.
We are here to offer an empathic and genuine listening ear, without judgment - and or suitable holistic therapies - Call or email us today, here to help!